ineke.co.uk

today is the 7th anniversary of san diego accidentally setting off their entire show at the same time, resulting in the funniest and most efficient fireworks show ever

(CAUTION: LOUD 😂) pic.twitter.com/4qJ2h63HFy

— burnsey (@mrs_hippiequeen) July 4, 2019

Woody's actual full name is "Woody Pride", and has been since the earliest days of developing the original Toy Story.

— Lee Unkrich (@leeunkrich) August 2, 2009

My dad: ‘Did you hear what happened at Glastonbury? A chant was started against Boris Johnson by that excellent rapper.’ Us: ‘Which rapper, dad? Surely you don’t know the names of any excellent rappers?’ Him: ‘I certainly do, it was Spotify.’

— Lucy Worsley (@Lucy_Worsley) June 29, 2019

We all go through difficult days at times, but we must always remember that life is a grace. It is the miracle that God drew forth from nothing.

— Pope Francis (@Pontifex) June 30, 2019

It's terrible to hear about Piers Morgan isn't it? Nothing's happened but it's just terrible whenever you hear about him.

— TechnicallyRon (On all the platforms) (@TechnicallyRon) July 1, 2019

Q. How many 93-year-olds can silence a crowd of 50,000 people seventy years younger?

A. Just the one. pic.twitter.com/o562Y218Zt

— Jeremy Vine (@theJeremyVine) June 30, 2019

all 6 seasons of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air are back on netflix, so you can watch one of most heartbreaking sitcom scenes in TV history as often as you like pic.twitter.com/9rumazN5vv

— Netflix UK & Ireland (@NetflixUK) July 1, 2019

I'd like to announce my new business venture – a £1 a month gym chain. Feel free to share with anyone who may be interested – here's details…. pic.twitter.com/7HoxfgHxLH

— Martin Lewis (@MartinSLewis) July 1, 2019

In the film Yesterday (2019) The Beatles don't exist but Ed Sheeran does. Ed Sheeran cites The Beatles as one of his big influences. I put it to the court that if The Beatles don't exist, Ed Sheeran, too, cannot exist.

— Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) July 1, 2019

A newborn blue whale puts on 14 stone a day.

— Quite Interesting (@qikipedia) July 3, 2019

Dear Andy,
Your gran is so disappointed. But she concedes that Serena may just have the edge on her.
Love from Mum x https://t.co/ztPxE7T73F

— judy murray (@JudyMurray) July 2, 2019

"If England concede more goals I don't think they'll win but if they can score more goals they might"

Razor sharp insight from Jonathan.#ENGUSA

— innocent drinks (@innocent) July 2, 2019

After Brexit Party MEPs turn their backs on the EU anthem, the nation waits for them to turn their backs on the salary, pension and benefits too.

— Have I Got News For You (@haveigotnews) July 3, 2019

Can everybody just Please look at this cat pic.twitter.com/GEPe1XzurJ

— danee 🦖 (@itsdaneesaur) July 3, 2019

Odd grey urinals at the EU Parliament. But good that they're non-gender-specific. pic.twitter.com/RRkV4ateS0

— David Baddiel (@Baddiel) July 3, 2019

In 2016, an octopus named Inky went missing from the New Zealand National Aquarium. It later emerged that he had removed the lid of his tank, crawled across the floor, squeezed himself into a narrow pipe and escaped into the ocean.

— Quite Interesting (@qikipedia) July 4, 2019

Yep, that's my life.https://t.co/0czlZZ1Yr3

— Jeremy Vine (@theJeremyVine) July 4, 2019

The main problem with the world is that none of the right people have imposter syndrome.

— Bethany Black (@BeffernieBlack) July 3, 2019

Fact box: the Little Mermaid lives on a TROPICAL CORAL REEF with a calypso-singing lobster with a strong Jamaican accent. When you think about it, it's bizarre she was white the first time around.

— Caitlin Moran (@caitlinmoran) July 4, 2019

Hands up if you’re so old that you know what ‘dossing’ means/meant

— Shaparak Khorsandi شاپرک خرسندی (@ShappiKhorsandi) July 4, 2019

So… @stormzy takes Glastonbury to church – a thread:

I think that when he performed Blinded by Your Grace (pt 2) on the Pyramid stage, we saw the most important spiritual/cultural moment of the year. (1/9)

(here it is, in case you need to catch up: https://t.co/c5aNTfIfWx)

— Martin Saunders (@martinsaunders) July 5, 2019

After The Brexit Party says Britain must tighten its borders, experts suggest we do it now while they’re all in Strasbourg.

— Have I Got News For You (@haveigotnews) July 5, 2019

I’ve found a new way to ruin massive pop star’s “sexy” bathroom Instagram photos. Just add the B&Q logo in the corner… pic.twitter.com/ta6bkwsweN

— Will Foster (@wgsfoster) July 4, 2019

It’s an easy mistake to make https://t.co/tojuwLCGQa

— Krishnan Guru-Murthy (@krishgm) July 5, 2019

me https://t.co/CL8w8LuqJM

— Mark Hamill (@MarkHamill) June 30, 2019

Now that's new 💦🤣 #Wimbledon pic.twitter.com/WwPwm4eY1L

— Wimbledon (@Wimbledon) July 5, 2019

Wonderful stuff from the Waitrose POS team pic.twitter.com/THhLRom2UA

— Bryan Roberts (@BryanRoberts72) July 5, 2019

Nobody loves a traffic warden … apart from this guy who ticketed Tommy Robinson's campaign bus outside the Old Bailey and laughed off all the abuse from Yaxley-Lennon's band of thugs.pic.twitter.com/Zl75zKN2aG

— Another Angry Voice (@Angry_Voice) July 5, 2019