if i was max verstappen once i won the wdc i would start doing random shit & seeing if i could still win, can i out-qualify everyone on hards, i would have people accusing me of disrespecting the sport
— Formula Whatever (@formulawhatever) August 26, 2023
— internet hall of fame (@InternetH0F) August 27, 2023
If I have to call a company's customer care with a problem, I usually ask them to hang on for a sec, while I pretend I've been interrupted, I then proceed to whisper "I'm on a Mystery Shopping call". They think I'm checking their service, and I always get 110% from that person
— Fesshole 🧻 (@fesshole) August 26, 2023
— ShitpostGateway (@ShitpostGate) August 27, 2023
Here’s a sentence I never thought I’d say….
— Karun Chandhok (@karunchandhok) August 28, 2023
Went to get a picture with Steve Carell, got photobombed by the King of the Netherlands!
😂🇳🇱 #DutchGrandPrix #TheOffice #Anchorman pic.twitter.com/pjcH1mWFBi
Breaking:
— The Purple Pimpernel (@Eyeswideopen69) August 28, 2023
Suella Braverman to table Illegal Drowning People bill in parliament.
Under her new legislation, the RNLI will have to check documentation before boarding victims.
Ridiculous right?
Not for stupid racists. pic.twitter.com/TM3eQND8CQ
Of all the current UK air traffic control crisis stories, this one is possibly the most heartbreaking 💔 😉 pic.twitter.com/RRHRqSymOj
— Amy 🐈⬛ (@AmyL_IoM) August 28, 2023
It’s going to take us a while to digest what we saw when we went to help salvage tents and equipment for a refugee charity at the end of Leeds Festival yesterday.
— Jack Lowe (@MrJackLowe) August 29, 2023
This is just a fraction of it — littering on the grandest scale we’ve ever witnessed.
Utterly appalling. pic.twitter.com/vNWOjIul74
Thank you Greenbelters for the love and respect you show our beautiful festival home here at Boughton. You’ve done it again. #LeaveNoTrace #TravelLight pic.twitter.com/CeIHAWLvFl
— Greenbelt Festival (@greenbelt) August 28, 2023
— NO CONTEXT HUMANS (@HumansNoContext) August 29, 2023
I love trash. I despise litter.
— Oscar the Grouch (@OscarTheGrouch) August 29, 2023
problematic things lewis hamilton has done – a very important thread! pic.twitter.com/BVAg3Jh1Sv
— سیس (@VARMILT0N) August 29, 2023
In a few years, when the kids leave home, the wife & I are planning to downsize to a smaller house. She's told me I'll need to significantly reduce my vinyl collection – so I've started buying up cheap records I don't want so I can "sacrifice" them when the time comes.
— Fesshole 🧻 (@fesshole) August 30, 2023
Using early morning condensation from a hail net to water crops
— Science girl (@gunsnrosesgirl3) August 30, 2023
📹 Jack Adelaide:pic.twitter.com/CIjccAJlEj
What happens when you can’t show us pictures of the super moon?
— Scott Bryan (@scottygb) August 31, 2023
You improvise. pic.twitter.com/fMcTh2jehs
It fought back.. 😂 pic.twitter.com/IDswGK9eKQ
— Buitengebieden (@buitengebieden) August 31, 2023
Nothing to see here. Only a seagull riding another seagull, mid-flight
— Science girl (@gunsnrosesgirl3) August 31, 2023
pic.twitter.com/hDSrn21wMc
Could have got a sandwich and a drink for £3.50 if they had their More Card https://t.co/XcZaHEfXgU
— Morrisons (@Morrisons) September 1, 2023
what if you fell in love with someone then found out they went to Kings Cross to cheer for an imaginary train https://t.co/MvjU0cfWvK
— hannah louise (@hannahlouisef) September 2, 2023
ineke.co.uk 
Anything to add...?