— The Mary Rose (@MaryRoseMuseum) March 31, 2026
My phone number is a 7-digit prime that shows up in the digits of pi. My husband's phone number is a 7-digit prime that shows up in the digits of e. We met when training students for the Maths Olympiad. The fess is how nerdy we both are.
— Fesshole🧻 (@fesshole) March 30, 2026
Flawless, no notes. Not sure if we can compete, but see our version here: https://t.co/H4WXU6cZRL
— NASA (@NASA) April 1, 2026
we need to have a national conversation about the shape of these weird squashed eggs pic.twitter.com/p5SQUU1rie
— Joanna Hardy-Susskind (@Joanna__Hardy) April 3, 2026
If I accidentally get a letter meant for next door, I won't put it through their letter box. Instead, I'll take it to the post box and make the post man deliver it again, properly. Not my fucking job.
— Fesshole🧻 (@fesshole) April 3, 2026
The One Commandment. 😎 pic.twitter.com/SkRlLC5AiM
— Judianna (@Judianna) April 3, 2026
Every copy of the Private Eye that comes through our door goes straight into the recycling. I just don't have the time or energy to read it, not even the cartoons. But proper journalism needs to be supported, and I do my bit.
— Fesshole🧻 (@fesshole) April 4, 2026
‘Tis that day again when Jesus closes big Tesco but allows entry to Tesco Express.
— Lisa P 🏴 (@evanslis456) April 5, 2026
My friends often feel bad I'm single saying it must be hard etc, it ain't, today I'm eating a bowl of custard for tea because I can, meanwhile my friend can't play football tomorrow because he's got to cut the grass and fit some shelves, so who's the idiot?
— Fesshole🧻 (@fesshole) April 4, 2026
I am fckin BEGGING sports bra makers to sew these pads in. Why are we still living like this???
— ⚡︎ (@_sorrengailll) April 5, 2026
It finally happened yesterday. We were all playing with a baby and then came then “When are you two going to get busyyy and pop one out?!” and I firmly said, “When we quit losing them.” and the crowd fell silent. Don’t ask questions in which you aren’t prepared for the answer!
— M (@wndrstruckblush) April 6, 2026
4×10 hour days is 40 hours, just the same as 5×8 hour days.
— John O'Connell (@jdpoc) April 8, 2026
This is the ‘Leader of the Opposition’. And she can’t do basic mathematics. https://t.co/noKWoU1qKb
ineke.co.uk 
Anything to add...?