ineke.co.uk

The word lasso needs another O at the end

— Anon Opin. (@anon_opin) November 1, 2025

If you feel like you're bad at your job and it's making you depressed, just consider that, as the investigation of the recent heist revealed, the password to access the Louvre's videosurveillance system was "Louvre".

— Philippe Lemoine (@phl43) November 4, 2025

6yo: What’s the biggest number?

Me: There are an infinite number of numbers so there’s no biggest one.

6yo: What’s the biggest number you know the name of?

Me: A googolplex.

6yo: Which is bigger, a googolplex or a googoobazillion?

Me: There’s not a number named a…

— Erik Berlin (@sferik) October 21, 2025

“X (formerly Twitter)”

You mean Twitter (currently X)?

— Gail🦩 (@nonsothegirlx) October 24, 2025

They had the opportunity to do the funniest thing and took it #strictly pic.twitter.com/XmRpgJ39HV

— poppy ☾ (@scddevereaux) October 18, 2025

I guess it feels very Simpsons for this joke to still be accurate by a 4 day margin https://t.co/Z7d0HLhw1U pic.twitter.com/FlbHGriq7O

— NICKtendo (@itsnicktendo) September 29, 2025

Gary Lineker on winning the National TV Award,

"It's not lost on me why I might have won this award"

"Aside from presenting Match of the Day, the most iconic football show for 26 years"

"Also, I think it demonstrates that perhaps it's ok sometimes to use our platform to speak… pic.twitter.com/hHtMSrc219

— Farrukh (@implausibleblog) September 10, 2025

‘Booty’ and ‘butt’ are synonyms.

‘Call’ and ‘dial’ are synonyms.

But, a ‘booty call’ and a ‘butt dial’ are VERY different things.

— Merriam-Webster (@MerriamWebster) September 12, 2025

Well done to everyone involved in this. #TheThursdayMurderClub pic.twitter.com/MdtAH6YDl8

— Netflix UK & Ireland (@NetflixUK) August 31, 2025