If Harry Potter went to Hogwarts school of Prayer and Miracles
Innovations that should have happened by now
If you get your tongue stuck in a mouse trap you will pronounce it mouth trap for a short period of time. https://t.co/49QGEfElTb
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) October 25, 2015
Sunday to-do list: 1. Sit
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) October 25, 2015
Longest things ever: 3. Labour leadership election 2. Chilcot enquiry 1. This episode of #XFactor
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) October 24, 2015
Be selective in your battles, sometimes peace is better than being right.
— Nicky Gumbel (@nickygumbel) October 24, 2015
I'm as happy when my internet goes out at work as I am angry when my internet goes out at home. https://t.co/YYpftQBMUk
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) October 26, 2015
Since it's payday I might treat myself to a little luxury and buy some sanitary towels 🙄🙄🙄
— Claire Waldorf (@clairwaldorf) October 28, 2015
Q: Doing anything for Halloween? A: Locking the door, drawing the curtains and sitting very quietly
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) October 31, 2015
They're playing very well, but I think it's probably about time that we started just calling them "Zealand". #RWCFinal
— James Martin (@Pundamentalism) October 31, 2015
Call me a sceptic, but I just don't think he looks like a 'real customer' … pic.twitter.com/Xa3HcQ2r9z
— Bethan Gorman (@Mrs_Gorman) October 29, 2015
'The Government needs to stop taxing women for having a uterus' https://t.co/5jmFrhkHCV
— The Independent (@Independent) October 25, 2015
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Could-Pee-This-Francesco-Marciuliano/dp/1452110581
Anything to add...?