Items returned to shops because the customer’s an idiot
The first #Olympics2016 gold medal for the USA is in shooting a gun.
That's deep.— Shane Claiborne (@ShaneClaiborne) August 7, 2016
Why aren't there capital numbers? E.G. 511 start with a capital 5. So it's 5��. Does that make sense? Hello…
— Tim Vine (@RealTimVine) August 6, 2016
Does anyone know if the Copacabana is still the hottest spot north of Havana? Are music and passion still the fashion?#RioOlympics2016
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) August 6, 2016
Last Olympics: SO into gymnastics
4 years between Olympics: forgets gymnastics exists
This Olympics: SO into gymnastics #RioOlympics2016— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 6, 2016
Our #Strictly celebrities for 2016? @TessDaly and @ClaudiaWinkle can't wait to tell you… pic.twitter.com/eU4Ki9ADNV
— BBC Strictly (@bbcstrictly) August 7, 2016
1 racist landlord
2 bankrupt
3 creepy pageant owner
4 bankrupt
5 fire people on tv
6 bankrupt
7 failed presidential nominee#firstsevenjobs— sean. (@SeanMcElwee) August 7, 2016
I see Chris Grayling is already winning friends and influencing people at Transport (this in the Brighton Argus) pic.twitter.com/grGrD9lWcW
— Andrew Neilson (@neilsonandrew) August 7, 2016
People who read books live longer on average than those who don’t.
— The QI Elves (@qikipedia) August 9, 2016
Us: that was an excellent dive
Commentators: oh, they've made a huge error there
Us: that was a terrible dive#diving— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 8, 2016
Bored at work already? It could be worse – you could be a lifeguard at the Olympics. pic.twitter.com/ZM0FOytMCc
— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 8, 2016
Writing
Stuff
Vertically
Gives
It
A
Kind
Of
Unwarranted
Poetic
Resonance
In
An
Age
Where
We
Scroll
Down
More
Than
Read
Across.— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) August 7, 2016
Can we stop with the warnings and just let nature take its course. pic.twitter.com/YlkYSHhI2l
— The Darwin Awards (@AwardsDarwin) August 7, 2016
BREAKING: Nigel Farage has a moustache. 77,482 hipsters just shaved theirs off in the last hour.
— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) August 12, 2016
Men are struck by lightning six times more often than women.
— The QI Elves (@qikipedia) August 12, 2016
"It's not what I expected" – It's a massive disappointment
"It's not at all what I expected" – It's surprisingly good!
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 12, 2016
Hey, y'all remember these older Pokemon toys? #TBT #tamagotchi pic.twitter.com/18hTKOo20K
— David Crowder (@crowdermusic) August 11, 2016
Twitter getting its own death hoax on Twitter is possibly the most meta thing that has ever happened. #savetwitter
— Martin Saunders ن (@martinsaunders) August 11, 2016
Southern rail strike called off so normal service will soon resume. Commuters are not expected to notice any difference. #southernstrike
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) August 10, 2016
Gyms should offer a membership package where you pay for every day that you don't go. https://t.co/XFnV3IdUoK
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) August 10, 2016
Poor Donald Trump. He's almost at the end of his list of things to say and do to get out of becoming President. pic.twitter.com/Mo2qAMXKBT
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) August 9, 2016
The skills of the Olympic gymnasts become even more impressive when you remember how difficult you find it to touch your toes #gymnastics
— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 9, 2016
Last resort of man running out of ways to push back calendar. pic.twitter.com/SprjwfS9r5
— Chris Addison (@mrchrisaddison) August 12, 2016
We realised today that #EquestrianDressage is even better when you put it to slightly out of date pop songs.https://t.co/hGwjIClnZv
— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 12, 2016
It's also the eve of @GaryLineker's #MOTD pants promise https://t.co/zOiXK3AnIp https://t.co/wj6rZgYZ3M
— BBC News (UK) (@BBCNews) August 12, 2016
Do you know the inspiring story of Eric "The Eel" Moussambani? 💦 ❤️https://t.co/6rRahPvaku
— Olympics (@Olympics) August 12, 2016
Amazing #CSLewis infographic from Mike Del Rosario – @ApologeticsGuy pic.twitter.com/MgFQjFhCU1
— C. S. Lewis (@CSLewisDaily) August 10, 2016
Wiggins with Hoy and Redgrave. 21 Olympic medals, 16 gold. Some line-up #Rio2016 https://t.co/EMrtUmDd7n pic.twitter.com/d17iIryElI
— Graeme Demianyk (@GraemeDemianyk) August 12, 2016
This woman has out-stalked us. What an achievement #funnymemes #wednesday
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