ineke.co.uk

"I want you to talk to me like I'm dirt, like I'm nothing," She urged. "Have you considered a career in teaching?" Michael Gove replied.

— 50 Shades of Tory (@50ShadesOfTory) May 9, 2015

pic.twitter.com/zWE33twoBZ

— Christian Aid (@christian_aid) May 11, 2015

Hugh Bonneville had the best loser face ever at the Bafta TV Awards http://t.co/H1zTpZJK3B pic.twitter.com/IF8sdJRxYn

— Metro (@MetroUK) May 10, 2015

A friskin is the life and soul of the party. A zob is the one who has to leave before everyone can relax and enjoy themselves.

— Susie Dent (@susie_dent) May 9, 2015

Woman gets parking ticket after council "lifts" car on to yellow lines http://t.co/UF1t7LnqYy pic.twitter.com/IVbz2NkA0W

— BBC News (UK) (@BBCNews) May 11, 2015

BREAKING: Re-fuelling will return to F1 in 2017. The sport that goes round in circles in more ways than one…

— Jake Humphrey (@mrjakehumphrey) May 15, 2015

If you got your tongue stuck in a mouse trap, you'd start pronouncing it mouth trap, and that is also what it woul… http://t.co/KXEgQFTuUT

— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) May 15, 2015

Awesome! Man creates brilliant five Olympic rings bike to tour China on http://t.co/eV3TNMIDpI pic.twitter.com/tDA4m8T0wA

— Metro Sport (@Metro_Sport) May 16, 2015