ineke.co.uk

H from steps is 40 . What

— caroline flack (@carolineflack1) May 8, 2016

Well, that’s one way to deal with a tattoo you regret https://t.co/bMZUapvqdN

— Metro (@MetroUK) May 8, 2016

This teacher has given the best advice to her students https://t.co/tEwbIvi74E

— Metro (@MetroUK) May 8, 2016

People judging @Sheridansmith1 highlight how far we still have to go for mental and physical health to warrant equal understanding.

— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) May 12, 2016

Australian entry on stage at #Eurovision. Just in case you were wondering, this is how the world map looks now pic.twitter.com/OvUsghvggT

— innocent drinks (@innocent) May 12, 2016

Don't worry if you've forgotten the first rule of Passive Aggressive Club, it's fine.

— James VHS Gent ⚡ (@jamesgent76) May 12, 2016

When I feel sad about politics I just imagine being American.

— jc (@jjjjoooonnnn) May 12, 2016

Limericks in 140 characters
Tricky with such short parameters
We wanted to say
On #NationalLimerickDay
Rhyme better than us, we're amateurs

— innocent drinks (@innocent) May 12, 2016

You are hearing this sentence with your eyes. https://t.co/7AQBL1KaZw

— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) May 12, 2016

Exclusive photo of the salesman who pitched the #JesusFreakCruise pic.twitter.com/EpI6qahVeI

— Emily Armstrong (@StrongarmEmily) May 11, 2016

9pm: "I'm so tired"
10pm: "Might go to bed in a bit"
11pm: "Right, I'm off, night night"
11.05pm-3am: Twitter

— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) May 11, 2016

Google is adding payday loan ads to its ban list (alongside guns and drugs) https://t.co/O4irkwsxW7 pic.twitter.com/RLXaZDxVO7

— i newspaper (@theipaper) May 11, 2016

One side of argument: posting photos of animals is very lazy and doesn't sell any smoothies
Other side of argument: pic.twitter.com/oHmUUApHr2

— innocent drinks (@innocent) May 11, 2016

The Armenian contestant has just danced with herself in hologram form. Armenia have just cranked this competition up a notch #Eurovision

— innocent drinks (@innocent) May 10, 2016

Teacher graffitis desks to inspire children https://t.co/lIcd31COMN

— Metro (@MetroUK) May 10, 2016

Nigeria and Afghanistan. Don’t be offended. Remember that, for David Cameron, “fantastically corrupt” is a compliment.

— David Schneider (@davidschneider) May 10, 2016

Taking these children is not the best we can do for these children, it is the least we can do.@timfarron #refugeechildren

— krish kandiah (@krishk) May 9, 2016

Maths professor removed from plane after his equations caused terrorism fears https://t.co/m50cYyOpMy

— Metro (@MetroUK) May 9, 2016

For a fee, Finland's postal workers will mow people's lawns, shovel snow or provide day care for the elderly when they deliver their mail

— The QI Elves (@qikipedia) May 9, 2016

The Queen won a Tesco voucher at the horses and looked thrilled https://t.co/1XCwd37dvE

— The Independent (@Independent) May 13, 2016