ineke.co.uk

Really looking forward to all the new events at the Olympics pic.twitter.com/HUXKyMXcnk

— Sean Leahy (@thepunningman) August 2, 2016

"Sir, we have some bad news. You might want to sit down"

*I lean back and fall to the floor*

"I'm afraid your couch has been stolen"

— Sean Leahy (@thepunningman) August 2, 2016

Months of 2016 so far:
1. January
2. February
3. March
4. April
5. May
6. June
7. July
8. October

— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 2, 2016

Apple is replacing the pistol emoji with a green water gun in the next version of iOS 10 https://t.co/QEvA2jS1lb pic.twitter.com/CSonJbhsNj

— CNN (@CNN) August 1, 2016

Comparing what the Daily Mail had to say about 5p plastic bags last year and now https://t.co/GIxyEo9Wah pic.twitter.com/gIGAscIp78

— The Independent (@Independent) August 1, 2016

AVOID being called rude by saying you're from Yorkshire and you tell it like it is. (via @PapasWorld27)#YorkshireDay

— 𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧𝘄𝗶𝗽𝘀 (@TwopTwips) August 1, 2016

If Monday was a fruit, it would be a seeded grape.

— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 1, 2016

August:
– bored children everywhere
– first mince pies spotted
– football again
– lots of running, lifting, jumping and throwing on telly

— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 1, 2016

#recap Reluctant Dad makes his children sign a contract before he gets them a doghttps://t.co/BynmDRxVJr pic.twitter.com/m6btNDoiZb

— The Poke (@ThePoke) July 31, 2016

Reading the new Harry Potter and tempted to wake up child 1 to read it to him like I used to. But he says he's 25.

— Simon Mayo 🇺🇦 (@simonmayo) July 31, 2016

"I never exactly made a book. It's rather like taking dictation. I was given things to say."#CSLewis

— C. S. Lewis (@CSLewisDaily) July 31, 2016

Worryingly in a rush this morning left my house without trousers on. Felt light but just thought I'd left keys. Realised on drive 👍

— Chris Stark (@Chris_Stark) August 4, 2016

Lord let this be accurate. Amen. (Taken from @RealClearNews) pic.twitter.com/aJTzCTQ09T

— Martin Saunders (@martinsaunders) August 4, 2016

Anyone who can be provoked by a tweet shouldn’t be anywhere near nuclear weapons.

— Hillary Clinton (@HillaryClinton) August 3, 2016

ME: I'll see you in a month
WIFE: Don't forget to write
ME: It's highly unlikely I'd forget such a basic skill, Sharon

— Marty Lawrence (@TeaAndCopy) July 26, 2016

There are 10k takeaway cups on this bus. The UK chucks that amount away every 2 mins. It has to stop. RT! #wastenot pic.twitter.com/FJhIp4v3wL

— Hugh's War on Waste (@HughsWaronWaste) March 14, 2016

Oh dear. pic.twitter.com/sh6kNA4j5D

— Ben Stanley (@BDStanley) August 5, 2016

"Hey ISIS, you suck!!!" A new campaign by #ActualMuslims pulls no punches https://t.co/upmn8PvV8i pic.twitter.com/p5eQk1Fhxf

— RNS (@RNS) August 5, 2016

What a historic moment!! The crowd went wild cheering them. #olympicrefugeeteam marches at Rio2016 #OpeningCeremony pic.twitter.com/2BmEbowqfK

— TeamRefugees (@TeamRefugees) August 6, 2016

NOW THIS IS HOW YOU FLAG BEAR #OpeningCeremony pic.twitter.com/66a5U3i24K

— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 6, 2016

It's flipping serious here – the @RadioTimes and highlighters are out…. #Olympics2016 pic.twitter.com/I228Hzdrry

— Chris Cook (@chrisckmedia) August 5, 2016