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No side and no person in history has been 100% right and it is silly and a bit totalitarian to pretend otherwise.
— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) August 2, 2016
Really looking forward to all the new events at the Olympics pic.twitter.com/HUXKyMXcnk
— Sean Leahy (@thepunningman) August 2, 2016
"Sir, we have some bad news. You might want to sit down"
*I lean back and fall to the floor*
"I'm afraid your couch has been stolen"
— Sean Leahy (@thepunningman) August 2, 2016
Don't think about 'beating' or 'curing' anxiety. Think about living with it, alongside it, accepting it, and existing and thriving with it.
— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) August 2, 2016
Months of 2016 so far:
1. January
2. February
3. March
4. April
5. May
6. June
7. July
8. October— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 2, 2016
When doing the limbo, if you set the bar low, then you’re setting the bar high. https://t.co/IhEcyPl0Mm
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) August 2, 2016
Apple is replacing the pistol emoji with a green water gun in the next version of iOS 10 https://t.co/QEvA2jS1lb pic.twitter.com/CSonJbhsNj
— CNN (@CNN) August 1, 2016
All these pieces questioning Trump's mental health aren't tarnishing him with mental illness but are tarnishing the mentally ill with Trump.
— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) August 1, 2016
A positive thing about depression is that it says you won't get out of it, and then you do, so you know you can do other impossible things.
— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) August 1, 2016
Comparing what the Daily Mail had to say about 5p plastic bags last year and now https://t.co/GIxyEo9Wah pic.twitter.com/gIGAscIp78
— The Independent (@Independent) August 1, 2016
If you put Donald Trumps hair on the Queen, you almost make Arsene Wenger… pic.twitter.com/GiBr9aiyVV
— Pie Sports Booze (@piesportsbooze) August 1, 2016
AVOID being called rude by saying you're from Yorkshire and you tell it like it is. (via @PapasWorld27)#YorkshireDay
— Twop Twips (@TwopTwips) August 1, 2016
If you're hotter than me, am I cooler than you? https://t.co/JFuvQcC5PM
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) August 1, 2016
If Monday was a fruit, it would be a seeded grape.
— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 1, 2016
August:
– bored children everywhere
– first mince pies spotted
– football again
– lots of running, lifting, jumping and throwing on telly— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) August 1, 2016
#recap Reluctant Dad makes his children sign a contract before he gets them a doghttps://t.co/BynmDRxVJr pic.twitter.com/m6btNDoiZb
— The Poke (@ThePoke) July 31, 2016
If my job was to procrastinate, I would be very productive. https://t.co/olMEbvijmS
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) July 31, 2016
Reading the new Harry Potter and tempted to wake up child 1 to read it to him like I used to. But he says he's 25.
— Simon Mayo (@simonmayo) July 31, 2016
"I never exactly made a book. It's rather like taking dictation. I was given things to say."#CSLewis
— C. S. Lewis (@CSLewisDaily) July 31, 2016
The healthiest I treat my body is when I'm already ill https://t.co/MLq85Nscra
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) July 30, 2016
you didn't need a video of an otter eating lettuce, but here you go pic.twitter.com/fFWQ651OKl
— Cute Emergency (@CuteEmergency) July 30, 2016
An unknown street artist added Photoshop toolbars to several billboards pic.twitter.com/JX6vpUE4Cy
— Brilliant Ads (@Brilliant_Ads) August 2, 2016
I think anxiety is best understood as a condition you have to manage, like diabetes. You don't get rid of it, but you can get on top of it.
— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) August 2, 2016
As a 55 year old male, I thought Ariana Grande was a font. https://t.co/89ws4ytNE4
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) August 5, 2016
Worryingly in a rush this morning left my house without trousers on. Felt light but just thought I'd left keys. Realised on drive 👍
— Chris Stark (@Chris_Stark) August 4, 2016
every breath I take resets my 5 minute death timer https://t.co/E82d8uMFF5
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) August 4, 2016
Lord let this be accurate. Amen. (Taken from @RealClearNews) pic.twitter.com/aJTzCTQ09T
— Martin Saunders ن (@martinsaunders) August 4, 2016
Anyone who can be provoked by a tweet shouldn’t be anywhere near nuclear weapons.
— Hillary Clinton (@HillaryClinton) August 3, 2016
ME: I'll see you in a month
WIFE: Don't forget to write
ME: It's highly unlikely I'd forget such a basic skill, Sharon— Marty Lawrence (@TeaAndCopy) July 26, 2016
There are 10k takeaway cups on this bus. The UK chucks that amount away every 2 mins. It has to stop. RT! #wastenot pic.twitter.com/FJhIp4v3wL
— Hugh's War on Waste (@HughsWaronWaste) March 14, 2016
Oh dear. pic.twitter.com/sh6kNA4j5D
— Ben Stanley (@BDStanley) August 5, 2016
"Hey ISIS, you suck!!!" A new campaign by #ActualMuslims pulls no punches https://t.co/upmn8PvV8i pic.twitter.com/p5eQk1Fhxf
— Religion NewsService (@RNS) August 5, 2016
If Microsoft let you play Minesweeper or Solitaire while Windows updated we'd hate Windows updates a lot less https://t.co/WFZnD3sVbQ
— Shower Thoughts (@shwr_thoughts) August 6, 2016
Need to get the @Eurovision scoring system creators in to think of a quicker way to get the athletes into the Maracana tho #OpeningCeremony
— Dan Golding (@dangolding17) August 6, 2016
What a historic moment!! The crowd went wild cheering them. #olympicrefugeeteam marches at Rio2016 #OpeningCeremony pic.twitter.com/2BmEbowqfK
— TeamRefugees (@TeamRefugees) August 6, 2016
NOW THIS IS HOW YOU FLAG BEAR #OpeningCeremony pic.twitter.com/66a5U3i24K
— innocent drinks (@innocent) August 6, 2016
It's flipping serious here – the @RadioTimes and highlighters are out…. #Olympics2016 pic.twitter.com/I228Hzdrry
— Chris Cook (@chrisckmedia) August 5, 2016
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View this post on InstagramWHAT THE EFF 📷 via @unilad #funnymemes #clueless #tbt
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