ineke.co.uk

Saw this on Facebook and it kind of says it all. pic.twitter.com/EEPjvipbu4

— Danny Zuker (@DannyZuker) February 5, 2017

Starting to panic when a conversation doesn't end despite saying "anyway" and "right" at least ten times

— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) February 5, 2017

How to answer the door:
1. See person has arrived
2. Wait for doorbell
3. Count to five
4. Open and act surprised

— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) February 4, 2017

#recap Some wisdom from a physics professorhttps://t.co/DnAkkrxJR4 pic.twitter.com/WWcMc14W0t

— The Poke (@ThePoke) February 4, 2017

Still sad about the Bowling Green Massacre. I am also very cross that Narnia isn't on the list of banned countries.

— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) February 3, 2017

When you come off Twitter for a few hours and you're already four Trump scandals behind…

— tom jamieson (@jamiesont) February 3, 2017

'Why are you keeping me?'
'It says here you visited Iran in 2014.'
'I did.'
'Why?'
'I was prime minister of Norway.' https://t.co/LvhM0B7xfz

— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) February 3, 2017

I can't think of a shortage that has ever affected me less than the salad shortage.

— Richard Osman (@richardosman) February 3, 2017

I am deeply conflicted about Donald Trump taking a holiday so early. On the one hand, hypocrite, on the other hand, please take four years.

— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) February 3, 2017

A handy guide to tweeting about the Super Bowl. #SuperBowlSunday pic.twitter.com/7va1fFYXRy

— David Schneider (@davidschneider) February 5, 2017

#SUPERBOWL FACT: The Super Bowl is a 4 hour advert break that is occasionally interrupted by American football.

— innocent drinks (@innocent) February 5, 2017

A handy guide to tweeting about the Super Bowl. #SuperBowlSunday pic.twitter.com/7va1fFYXRy

— David Schneider (@davidschneider) February 5, 2017

Prince William, Harry and the Duchess of Cambridge ran a 50m dash to help fight stigma associated with mental health https://t.co/tjZ3xGSwDn

— Sky News (@SkyNews) February 5, 2017

Bannon: And sign here.
Trump: What's this one?
Bannon: Er, Taylor Swift wants an autograph.
Trump: Nice! [signs order putting Bannon on NSC] pic.twitter.com/w8oA4hYhmI

— David Schneider (@davidschneider) February 6, 2017

“I don’t want any engraving, just leave the metal plate blank. No engraving.”https://t.co/YnF8t81qUz pic.twitter.com/HfsI5m7EpW

— The Poke (@ThePoke) February 6, 2017

Another reason to love Tim Keller…And by 'love' I mean love in a brotherly Christian way, rather than 'worship the celeb pastor' way pic.twitter.com/S6Sn3FhztQ

— Sam Hailes ن (@samhailes) February 6, 2017

When cutting bagels, place your finger trough the hole to keep it steady. It's actually called the stabilisation hole. @TwopTwips pic.twitter.com/6619uhpfck

— W (@WWarped) February 6, 2017

"negative news = fake news" is the beginning of tyranny. https://t.co/2XHZGItRUQ

— deray mckesson (@deray) February 6, 2017

And then he tweeted…..
"SEE YOU IN COURT"
After just LOSING IN COURT‼️ pic.twitter.com/o759gp7hjB

— TheAverageBlackMan™ (@TheAvgBlackMan) February 10, 2017

Trump tweets that he'll "SEE YOU IN COURT"…to a court

I'll just leave this here then. pic.twitter.com/6mwNWtCtD8

— Joel Gleicher (@JoelG_88) February 10, 2017

Americans shot by other Americans in an average year: 11,737.

Americans killed by Islamic immigrant terrorists a year: 2.

I mean come on.

— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) February 11, 2017

Trump tells judges who ruled against travel ban “SEE YOU IN COURT”, surprising many with his elementary understanding of where judges work.

— HaveIGotNewsForYou (@haveigotnews) February 10, 2017

CONVINCE people you’re a Michelin starred chef by putting a smear of marmalade on your plate instead of on the toast.
(via @emptyheadtwo)

— Twop Twips (@TwopTwips) February 10, 2017

No child in America will ever again doubt that he or she has the intelligence and ability to be president. https://t.co/wmqOTepsgJ

— NY Review of Books (@nybooks) February 9, 2017

NEW PARENTS. Up to the age of around 4, kids don’t really know it’s their birthday unless you tell them. Save your money.
(via @bazlyons)

— Twop Twips (@TwopTwips) February 9, 2017

This . Thank you for dogs. pic.twitter.com/ykzE7EcB9K

— Dawn French (@Dawn_French) February 8, 2017

More people watched the final of 'Bake-Off' than go to see every single cinema film COMBINED in an average month in the U.K. https://t.co/YnEyeqbIRr

— Richard Osman (@richardosman) February 8, 2017

A good way to deal with the #anxietyepidemic is to stop romanticism around always working and not sleeping. It isn't healthy to never stop.

— Suhail Mohammed (@shadowwraiths) February 6, 2017

Thou shalt say "right" before standing up… #AwfullyBritishCommandments

— Benus Maximus (@BenMuldoon1) February 6, 2017

Thou shalt keep carrier bags inside a carrier bag in a drawer.For the time may come when thou shalt need all 200 #AwfullyBritishCommandments

— Rebecca Morgan (@BeccaMorgs) February 5, 2017

Thou shalt mention the weather at least once a day or lose the blessing of her Majesty to reside in this land.#AwfullyBritishCommandments

— Suhail Mohammed (@shadowwraiths) February 5, 2017

That shalt describe Brits living abroad 'ex-pats', but non-Brits living here as 'immigrants' #AwfullyBritishCommandments

— Rob Foster (@robwfoster) February 5, 2017