ineke.co.uk

On the lighter side of #gdpr (thanks Michael, made my day!)
– Do you know a good GDPR consultant?
– Yes.
– Can you give me his e-mail address?
– No.

— Klaus Johannes Rusch (@krusch) May 13, 2018

My mum is leaving it awfully close to the GDPR deadline to ask if I want to opt in to receive her emails, calls and texts.

— Sharon O'Dea (@sharonodea) May 15, 2018

ah, yes. #GDPR pic.twitter.com/jvI2f2o1eS

— alberta soranzo (@albertatrebla) May 15, 2018

Kids haven't responded to my GDPR requests so I don't think I'm legally allowed to tell them when dinner's on the table.

— Dave Turner (@mrdaveturner) May 17, 2018

Excited for the day after GDPR deadline day when, if I understand it, no one is legally allowed to talk to me ever again

— Dawn Foster (@DawnHFoster) May 16, 2018

Watch moment protester crashes SuRie's performance mid-song #Eurovisionhttps://t.co/cZFDc4N1VI pic.twitter.com/hacfy99wFW

— The Independent (@Independent) May 12, 2018

I shall soonbe tweeting from outside the Lindo Wing in London. Theres nothing happening there. But it’ll be more fun than this. #Eurovision

— Simon McCoy (@BBCSimonMcCoy) May 12, 2018

Joke’s on you Europe, wait until you see the song contest deals we’re going to sign with the US and the Commonwealth… #Eurovision

— Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) May 12, 2018

In my defence, the sign for the lift did look a BIT like the sign for a toilet… pic.twitter.com/OFSSJbDpfe

— Richard Osman (@richardosman) May 13, 2018

The idea that all hospitals now get the best brain tumour test only because someone the PM liked has died is so telling about their attitude to the rest of us.

— Stephen Mangan (@StephenMangan) May 14, 2018

FUN FACT (for the dimwitted)#MayTheDuhBeWithYou pic.twitter.com/LKJOUAE77G

— Mark Hamill (@HamillHimself) May 13, 2018

Einstein’s last words were spoken in German to a nurse who didn’t speak German and are lost for ever.

— Quite Interesting (@qikipedia) May 16, 2018

This is Monty. Monty just spent the last 10 minutes chasing his tail and now that his objective is complete he's just stood there like a weirdo not knowing what to do with his life. pic.twitter.com/5ksBBU6OlY

— TechnicallyRon (@TechnicallyRon) May 16, 2018

I have no time for royal wedding marketing, but I will make an exception for this fine piece of work. pic.twitter.com/pCj5Qp2sfj

— Hannah Al-Othman 🐝 (@HannahAlOthman) May 16, 2018

Sometimes when people seem rude or distant or cold they might really just be anxious or shy or sad.

— Matt Haig (@matthaig1) May 16, 2018

The fifth hyperfactorial: 5⁵ × 4⁴ × 3³ × 2² × 1¹ = 86400000 milliseconds is exactly 1 day! pic.twitter.com/9ENaHNqsBG

— Fermat's Library (@fermatslibrary) May 16, 2018

Imagine being so terrible that this is an accomplishment https://t.co/9tEpyd7c6b

— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) May 16, 2018

Tweet about Mental Health Awareness Week – 150 likes

Tweet about a vicar eating a pizza – 5000 likes

👍🏼

— Greg James (@gregjames) May 17, 2018

Good deed done today, at Aldi check out I was behind an old lady in the queue. Her bill came to £51.60 but when she counted out her change she had just under £50. She didn’t want me to help her bless her, but I insisted, and in no time we had all her shopping back on the shelves.

— GPV Hayes (@GaryHayes82) May 14, 2018

You had one job! pic.twitter.com/0Xd69QzVbl

— You Had One Job (@_youhadonejob1) May 17, 2018

I thought a Christian understanding of time was that the past is ever with us by our communion with the saints & in glimpses of the Kingdom, the future has already come but apparently it's actually more like something from a late 90s motivational poster. My bad. https://t.co/cFu7ZroNZX

— Fergus Butler-Gallie (@_F_B_G_) May 15, 2018

To the Yanny crowd:

Do you begin to percieve "Laurel" as the speed and pitch is increased?#yannyvslaurel pic.twitter.com/khB8CIg7SL

— *fennec noises* (@FennecSqueaks) May 16, 2018

RULES OF #ROYALWEDDING DAY:

1. There will be bunting
2. All food must be eaten from a commemorative plate
3. People are legally required to dress in head to toe Union Jack attire

— innocent drinks (@innocent) May 19, 2018

The #RoyalWedding is about to start. If you don’t want to see spoilers for series 56 of The Crown, LOOK AWAY NOW.

— innocent drinks (@innocent) May 19, 2018

I defy anyone who watched Harry as a young boy having to walk that awful walk in the full public glare at Diana’s funeral, to not have the grace to give him this happy and also public day without the sniping. Just let him have this day.

— Katy Brand (@KatyFBrand) May 19, 2018

What an entrance. #RoyalWedding https://t.co/vJOE39YkJ6 pic.twitter.com/KlEoY004kz

— Getty Images (@GettyImages) May 19, 2018

British weddings: “God is love, slight ooh-er joke, anyway good luck with being married, it’s hard work, let’s stand and sing Jerusalem.”
American weddings: “I HAVE A MESSAGE FOR YOU AND YOU WILL HEAR IT"

— Janine Gibson (@janinegibson) May 19, 2018