Annoying film cliches.
Did Regina George just not understand what Lebanese meant?
Inside one of London’s only lighthouses, a 1,000 year long piece of music has been playing since the year 2000. It will finish on New Year’s Eve 2999.
— Quite Interesting (@qikipedia) January 30, 2021
https://t.co/X3OJdKZgwU pic.twitter.com/QElAurwVyh
— Viz Comic (@vizcomic) January 31, 2021
Maximum job satisfaction of the day. pic.twitter.com/jXI5uMYGrc
— Dick King-Smith HQ (@DickKingSmith) January 30, 2021
Someone explain to me why joining the Pan Pacific bloc (other side of the world) is absolutely fine for Brexiters but joining the Single Market on our doorstep (which is no the same as rejoining the EU) isn’t?
— Emma Kennedy💙 (@EmmaKennedy) January 31, 2021
Let’s hope none of the members have an atlas… https://t.co/uaDTLGtxAQ
— Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) January 30, 2021
Today I uttered the words……..”when I was younger, WiFi didn’t exist”
It’s over isn’t it?
— Shaun Murphy (@Magician147) January 31, 2021
Some of the abuse on here is truly vile. How hard would it be to implement a system where you can’t get an account without photo ID? Removing the cloak of anonymity would surely reduce the number of fooligans & numpties.
— Dan Walker (@mrdanwalker) January 31, 2021
This far into lockdown the streaming services need to stop asking 'are you still there', of course we're still here there is no where to go. Instead they should now have messages like 'hope you're ok', 'maybe drink some water' and 'need more crisps?'
— Dave (@davechannel) January 31, 2021
A baby waved at me, we exchanged a gooey smile, and I tried to grasp the idea that one day I could be 75 and the same guy passes me but he’s a chartered surveyor.
— Mark Watson, author of Contacts, a novel which… (@watsoncomedian) January 31, 2021
A protocol question: in the Senate impeachment trial, will Trump be referred to as President, former President, ex-President, Mister, the defendant? It shouldn’t matter, but somehow I think it will.
— Hugh Laurie (@hughlaurie) January 31, 2021
I wrote a whatsapp mesg to my neighbour and accidentely posted it on my street's whatsapp. A few people wrote to me privately saying 'erm, you might wanna delete that'. I accidentely pressed 'delete just for me'. Now my waspish mesg can't be deleted so moving out right now.
— Shappi Khorsandi (@ShappiKhorsandi) January 31, 2021
I’m not a genius in the kitchen but I reckon I’d have worked this out. pic.twitter.com/biuKPqXkLB
— Mark Watson, author of Contacts, a novel which… (@watsoncomedian) February 1, 2021
Mmm… perfect rectangle month. This year February is an exact rectangle because it starts on a Monday and it’s not a leap year.
But it’s not as rare as I see people claiming (every 200 years apparently‽), it’s about every 10 years. The previous was 2010 and the next is 2027. pic.twitter.com/Ham05JB62L
— Matt Parker (@standupmaths) February 1, 2021
Some of my timeline is still saying January took ages, but you've also got the usual 'how can we already be here' tweeters, so when you average it out, maybe the month WAS the correct length.
— Mark Watson, author of Contacts, a novel which… (@watsoncomedian) February 1, 2021
Groundhog Day in the middle of lockdown feels somewhat superfluous…
— Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) February 2, 2021
How it started How it’s going pic.twitter.com/dwv8O1gVHd
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) February 1, 2021
It’s an unusual Achilles heel to have that once a year you go mad and lose 9-0.
— Mark Watson, author of Contacts, a novel which… (@watsoncomedian) February 2, 2021
Southampton fans watching their team get beat 9-0 pic.twitter.com/kgPq7bqvTk
— ODDSbible (@ODDSbible) February 2, 2021
Would still take a 9-0 loss once a season to have Hasenhuttl as manager.
— Mac (@Tweetgood_Mac) February 2, 2021
Better to lose one 9-0 than nine 1-0
— Rodger Davies (@rodger_davies) February 2, 2021
The Cistercian monks invented a numbering system in the 13th century which meant that any number from 1 to 9999 could be written using a single symbol pic.twitter.com/VRuEx4dkPF
— UCL Department of Mathematics (@MathematicsUCL) February 2, 2021
it is currently easier for a person from South Africa to bring COVID into Britain than it is for a person from Belfast to bring a pork pie.
— Mike Holden (@MikeHolden42) February 2, 2021
The UK government, making tough decisions.#COVID19 pic.twitter.com/qdAispFdYn
— The Poke (@ThePoke) February 3, 2021
Does anyone else find themselves wanting to go to bed early out of sheer boredom now, like some kind of mediaeval peasant who goes to sleep when it’s dark because after that there’s nothing to see anyway
— gabyhinsliff (@gabyhinsliff) February 2, 2021
Good they’ve lowered No 10’s flag to honour Captain Tom. Hope it stays lowered for the next 100,000 days to honour everyone else and remind us who’s responsible.
— Jonathan Lis (@jonlis1) February 2, 2021
If Boris Johnson really wants to pay tribute to Captain Tom, maybe commit to funding the NHS properly, starting with a proper pay rise for its workers. https://t.co/QOrOiigRFA
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) February 3, 2021
It would be great if we allocated more money for the NHS in Captain Tom’s memory so that in the future 100 year old aren’t having to fundra-oh they’ve announced another clap fantastic forget what I just said everyone
— Nish Kumar (@MrNishKumar) February 3, 2021
There is a deeper, practical point too. Capt Tom’s achievement in raising £38 million for the NHS is truly magnificent. But the NHS shouldn’t *have* to reply on charity. It’s our nation’s health service. It should be properly funded. By the govt, by our taxes, for us all.
— Rachel Clarke (@doctor_oxford) February 3, 2021
I cannot clap when 100k like Capt Tom have died – all loved, all cherished, all leaving their families heartbroken.
Capt Tom was inspirational. But clapping doesn’t feel right to me amid the vastness of our death & grief. Nor will clapping protect others. https://t.co/vFhqMmajUK
— Rachel Clarke (@doctor_oxford) February 3, 2021
Presented without comment
pic.twitter.com/F3YPMJc6eK— Sue Perkins 💙 (@sueperkins) February 3, 2021
After this interview wrapped, Captain Tom thanked @TVNaga01 wholeheartedly for giving up her time for him. Then turned to me & both camera operators, having learnt & remembered our names, & thanked us each individually. It was a true honour. pic.twitter.com/AvdOE1BMCy
— Katie Langton (@KatieLangton1) February 2, 2021
Next week, instead of #HouseOfGames, we're doing #ParishCouncilOfGames live from Handforth.
— Richard Osman (@richardosman) February 5, 2021
When are we clapping for Jackie Weaver?
— Emma Kennedy💙 (@EmmaKennedy) February 5, 2021
My daughter’s lost a baby tooth and because we’ve not paid for anything in cash for nearly A YEAR we have no coins in the house so I’ve taken £1 from her money box to give her and I feel like turning myself in
— Isy Suttie 💙 (@Isysuttie) February 6, 2021
A large boulder the size of a large boulder is blocking the southbound lane Hwy 145 mm28 in Stoner Creek area of Montezuma County. Expect delays. #largeboulder pic.twitter.com/9WJ1nKB67Q
— San Miguel Sheriff (@SheriffAlert) February 5, 2021
The extraordinary meeting of… the Football Focus Parish Council Planning Committee 👨⚖️
Catch how it all ended up on Football Focus, Saturday at 12:00 GMT 😅
📺 @bbciplayer and @bbcone#bbcfootball pic.twitter.com/fqNpkoUEZO
— Match of the Day (@BBCMOTD) February 5, 2021
After spending half a decade destroying the Union, Johnson has no idea how to save it. None at all. https://t.co/9TRh0b1LzJ
— Ian Dunt (@IanDunt) February 6, 2021
How old were you when you discovered that the TV suburb Erinsborough is an anagram of “Or Neighbours”?
— Craig Parkinson 💙 (@CParkinson535) February 6, 2021
300% THIS.
Imagine if we’d actually let Test and Trace be run by the NHS as well. pic.twitter.com/oHKL2vwhES
— Dr Dominic Pimenta 💙 *Please* Just Stay At Home (@DrDomPimenta) February 6, 2021
Here's my Unofficial #HouseOfGames spreadsheet – plenty of opponents to choose from.
Angela indisputably top at the moment, as you say!
You can already claim the No More Jockeys bragging rights, though, having outscored Alex and Tim this week!https://t.co/Ga2ejQwhEW— Daniel Hurst (@danielmarkhurst) February 5, 2021
This is what working collaboratively with clients/patients looks like.
This is what it means to see people as experts of their own experiences and see them as working with you towards their goal of wellness.
This goes for medical providers, psychiatrists, therapists, etc. https://t.co/CD1v6sxkRz
— Muting/Blocking = Self Care (@QueeringPsych) February 2, 2021
i just wish The Office was around for a pandemic episode. Dwight wouldn’t wear a mask. he’d embrace the virus to build his immune system. Creed woulda had a black market vaccine months ago. Michael? idk. i just know he’d HATE Zoom.
— Joseph Solomon (@whatisjoedoing) February 5, 2021
ineke.co.uk 
Anything to add...?