A whole load of weird facts.
I don’t think my constituents who have made huge sacrifices to keep us all safe, will be over the moon that the new health Secretary thinks that they are all a bunch of wusses… https://t.co/CGoYFybAWA
— Tim Farron (@timfarron) July 24, 2021
What are you on about “cower from”? 127,000 people have died from this virus, tens of thousands of whom would still be here if it wasn’t for the catastrophic failures of your government. So how dare you denigrate people for trying to keep themselves and their families safe. https://t.co/8q0C1shTrQ
— Angela Rayner (@AngelaRayner) July 24, 2021
129,000 people have died, many of them unnecessarily thanks to your government, and you use the word ‘cower’? https://t.co/lBIooLxgCM
— Matthew Stadlen (@MatthewStadlen) July 25, 2021
Lots of noise on here about how to react to SJ’s apology. A Christian perspective: Col 3:13 ‘..forgive as the Lord forgave you’. If we forgive in the same way God forgives us, then it will be utterly comprehensive, personally costly and we will do it with gladness.
— Tim Farron (@timfarron) July 25, 2021
I'm gonna say this instead of cheerio from now on pic.twitter.com/PuBtlFxTzR
— joe heenan (@joeheenan) July 24, 2021
She’s right, of course, but we should probably start talking about why the Venn diagram of climate science deniers, Covid fruitcakes & Brexit cheerleaders in the U.K. media is pretty much a circle. https://t.co/wmErpqWWyO
— James O'Brien (@mrjamesob) July 25, 2021
A reminder of the opening remarks that got @maitlis into trouble. The BBC has never pointed to any specific set of words that broke the rules – only a general ‘lack of balance’. But balance WAS available to the gov’t. It could have sent someone along. 1/2pic.twitter.com/QHRmqiWxiT
— Alex Andreou (@sturdyAlex) July 24, 2021
What a show. After being unable to rile the police officers, the protestors start fighting each other. https://t.co/ZpC7jVr3iy
— Shaparak Khorsandi (@ShappiKhorsandi) July 24, 2021
Am now amazed at how many Unqualified Dipsticks on Twitter tweeted to tell me I was wrong when I suggested that Unqualified Dipsticks have no business querying Actual Scientists. Seems I have upset the Unqualified Dipstick community.
— Adam Hills (@adamhillscomedy) July 25, 2021
In case you didn’t know – and I didn’t till a senior government official told me – the daily tally of infections seriously understates the actual number of infections, because if you are sick with Covid19 today but had it any time in the past (even last spring) your new bout…
— Robert Peston (@Peston) July 25, 2021
My husband watching gymnastics at the Olympics: Never really watched much of this before.
— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) July 25, 2021
My husband watching gymnastics at the Olympics 10 minutes later: Good technique but that dismount looked weak. Their leg looked bent on that last backflip but beautiful fluidity and lift.
Praying away covid when there’s a vaccine that could…answer your prayers.
— Kevin McHale (@druidDUDE) July 25, 2021
Finding something to watch on Netflix that everyone in your house enjoys https://t.co/fDMMHz77L1
— Sam Hailes ن (@samhailes) July 25, 2021
You stormed off set when lanced by your own colleagues. They challenged you because you claimed a woman – who said she had suicidal thoughts – was lying.
— Dan Walker (@mrdanwalker) July 26, 2021
Of course everyone watched but to claim that as a victory? Really? 😳😂
What a strange hill to die on. https://t.co/46ToDerqRV
My six year old just looked out the window at Waitrose and said, “it’s raining almost as much as Boris Johnson rains lies down on the British public.” The whole supermarket applauded for twelve solid minutes.
— Alex Dale (@typofoto) July 25, 2021
A quick guide to the sports of the Tokyo #Olympics pic.twitter.com/nfhN8FmUus
— Dave (@davechannel) July 26, 2021
Real journalists don't flounce off in the huff when they lose an argument pic.twitter.com/dx5kUTQn9E
— joe heenan (@joeheenan) July 26, 2021
Weightlifters are amazing but it'd be a more mainstream success if we had context; they should make them lift actual stuff. A Le Creuset pot full of risotto. All their team's luggage they brought over. Piggyback for an organiser's cousin.
— Mark Watson, the guy with that book, 'Contacts' (@watsoncomedian) July 26, 2021
Saw someone drinking a can of Guinness on the tube (against the law, I believe). But what really shocked me was that he was using a straw. It takes all sorts!
— The Church Mouse (@thechurchmouse) July 26, 2021
Doesn’t ‘price point’ just mean price or am I missing something?
— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) July 26, 2021
The thing about something that’s oven ready, you see, is that you can’t return it to the shop after you’ve cooked it.
— Chris Addison💙 (@mrchrisaddison) July 27, 2021
1) It already passed by harmlessly
— Katie Mack (@AstroKatie) July 26, 2021
2) It was more than 10 times farther away from us than the Moon
3) It’s so harmless NASA removed it from the potential impact list back in 2008
4) Please do not get astronomy news from TMZ pic.twitter.com/pDWhlCvi64
Amazing engineering right there 🤣 @theJeremyVine pic.twitter.com/dngtRz7ofn
— Lee Drake 🏴 (@LeeDrak35026023) July 26, 2021
Allow me to be the ninth person to RT this into your timeline with the words "this made me cry." People rejoicing SO HARD is such an under-appreciated jam. https://t.co/7pjBiv7dh1
— Caitlin Moran (@caitlinmoran) July 27, 2021
Saw this on Facebook. Had a search and found it was drawn by @dawnymock. Simple yet so effective. pic.twitter.com/dvWPC0Wm3n
— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) July 27, 2021
One of the central lessons of the Olympics should be that we don’t think that injuries can only be physical, and somehow categorise mental health problems as lesser. An emerging theme of the games is the problem of pressure and how much more honest athletes can be about it.
— Stig Abell (@StigAbell) July 27, 2021
GERMINATE pic.twitter.com/V04c6VUNZG
— Steel Dalek (@SteelDalek1) July 26, 2021
There's no point banning Russia from international competition for systematic cheating if athletes can just compete as the Russian Olympic Committee. If they are permitted to compete at all they should just be labelled "Independent Athletes" with no mention of Russia.
— Nicola Palios (@NicolaPalios) July 26, 2021
The fact that Russia is banned from the games for doping but all its athletes are allowed to compete for the Russian Olympic Committee is such a magnificent example of shoddy appeasement it is almost art.
— Stig Abell (@StigAbell) July 27, 2021
Instead of making offenders wear high viz jackets in chain gangs, how about helping them get a real job instead? In my shops we employ lots of ex offenders and they wear a shirt and tie. Same people, different approach, a much better outcome.
— James Timpson (@JamesTCobbler) July 27, 2021
Best thing I’ve seen all day pic.twitter.com/6cxVdyH0hE
— Sam Hailes ن (@samhailes) July 27, 2021
New GIF template just dropped https://t.co/3QwIVkuAwA
— Aaron (@AaronBoardley) July 28, 2021
Say “people” not “migrants”. pic.twitter.com/UYMold3Tvg
— Dr Dominic Pimenta (@DrDomPimenta) July 28, 2021
Buy Second-Hand.
— Patrick Grant (@paddygrant) July 28, 2021
The most sustainable clothes are the ones that already exist. So if you really want to live in a way that's best for the planet then love the clothes you have, fix them, pass them on, swap them, ebay them, or give them to a charity shop or a clothing bank. pic.twitter.com/cjcHm3f0j5
SOBER GIRL! I get asked so much, “how do I cope,when I’m out in a group, they all do SHOTS,you don’t want to feel left out?” ANSWER we went out on Monday and the others had Baby Guinness,mine as you can see is my SPECIAL Pineapple Juice….there is always an option 😀#sober #proud pic.twitter.com/yNDw5xcexR
— Lisa Jane riley (@Reallisariley) July 28, 2021
Boris Johnson took a private plane from London to Cornwall for the G7 https://t.co/kiAqLNzir5
— Harriet Clugston (@HarrietClugston) July 27, 2021
Don’t fly to Cornwall for climate summits. https://t.co/ragGvecdUC
— Dr Charlotte Lydia Riley (@lottelydia) July 27, 2021
God grant me the confidence of a middle aged man who walked off his own TV show because someone argued with him a little bit to start lecturing world class athletes about their mental resilience.
— Katy Brand (@KatyFBrand) July 28, 2021
This otter with Adam Peaty commentary #Olympics pic.twitter.com/7BCy9yBfVN
— Olaf Falafel (@OFalafel) July 27, 2021
If you don't have any actual talent which gets people's attention then you have to get attention in other ways.
— Richard Osman (@richardosman) July 28, 2021
Isn't that what back to the drawing board means? pic.twitter.com/sGmRQmVqEr
— Philip Cowley (@philipjcowley) July 28, 2021
Sky One peaked when John Tickle walked on custard. https://t.co/V6hihDtU4a
— Dietrich🦞🥒 (@ItsDietrich) July 28, 2021
The soft, high-pitched chirping of ducklings is called QUEEPLING. pic.twitter.com/nq8quikFlP
— Haggard Hawks 🦅 (@HaggardHawks) July 28, 2021
Okaaaay…. Heard about this thing channel 4 are doing where they put black people on all their tv shows *but only for one day!!!* and they’re calling it ‘Black to Front’??! What in the performative tokenism.. I .. I have no words. Stop it.. Just hire black ppl in general plz! 😩
— London Hughes (@TheLondonHughes) July 28, 2021
Simone Biles won nationals w/broken toes in both feet, worlds w/a kidney stone, and has carried the burden of being a face of sexual assault survivors as a national institution failed to support them
— Kavitha A. Davidson (@kavithadavidson) July 27, 2021
Half of y'all yelling about "toughness" can't handle wearing a mask in Wegman's
me: are you mad at me?
— not sara (genuinely hillary) (@smithsara79) July 28, 2021
friend: of course not!
me: okay i’ll keep checking until that changes
The only example he can think of to try and garner sympathy for his questioning a young black woman’s mental health is from the time he was rightly criticised after he questioned yet another young black woman’s mental health pic.twitter.com/5xutaoF0XV
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) July 28, 2021
“It’s okay not to be okay” has swiftly morphed into “it’s okay not to be okay as long as you inconvenience no one, maintain your same level of productivity and responsibility, and don’t fall short of the standard we’ve decided to hold you to.”
— Rainesford Stauffer (@Rainesford) July 28, 2021
oh my goddddd pic.twitter.com/FMa63dB2Nk
— Helen Rosner (@hels) July 28, 2021
1) it is not illegal for anyone to cross the channel on any vessel.
— sirdaveking (@KingSirdave) July 28, 2021
2) an asylum seeker can seek asylum wherever they wish ( Geneva convention).
3)An asylum seeker only becomes "illegal" if they don't register with the authorities upon entry. Until that time they are "legal".
The last two runners in the Pittsburgh Marathon, not letting each other quit.
— Rachel Gardner (@RachelGardnerRA) July 28, 2021
Glorious.
The last are first.
Thanks to @brett_jordan for drawing my attention to this photo – one of my hand holders in life’s harsh races. pic.twitter.com/gq1k0i3B3d
I love this silent movie https://t.co/v657p64a8V
— Julia Ioffe (@juliaioffe) July 28, 2021
Can someone compile a list of brands advertising during Nigel Farage’s show please? Because I never want to buy anything from them again.
— Emma Kennedy💙 (@EmmaKennedy) July 29, 2021
Mr Blobby should be the next Dr Who. His chaotic attitude towards everything would perfectly represent the country at this time.
— Dave (@davechannel) July 29, 2021
New: The RNLI says it's received over £200,000 in donations yesterday alone, after lifeboat volunteers told of the criticism they've faced in rescuing people crossing the Channel
— Emily Ashton (@elashton) July 29, 2021
Has ANYONE ever bought something as a result of a flier being left under their windscreen wiper? Someone must be giving these bastards hope…
— Adrian Edmondson (@AdrianEdmondson) July 29, 2021
i made a list of events. i think should be added. to the olympics
— Thoughts of Dog® (@dog_feelings) July 29, 2021
2. the 100m hardwood floor slide
9. least time between naps
3. walking on the opposite side of a tree. so your human has to switch the hand they are holding the leash with
6. floor routine. but it’s belly rubs
Team GB News – swimming is great.
— Paul Sinha (@paulsinha) July 29, 2021
GB News – drowning is great.
The X Factor ended in 2008. pic.twitter.com/0qJptshze2
— Justin Myers (@theguyliner) July 28, 2021
I'm puzzled
— John Cleese (@JohnCleese) July 31, 2021
Some of the transgender community seem to think that if you disagree with any of their views, you must therefore hate them
But if they disagree with you…does that mean, therefore, that they hate you ?
Puzzled of Weston-super-Mare
Years ago parents would say that BMX and Skateboarding were worthless endeavours and now they are olympic sports so hopefully in a few decades you'll be able to win a gold medal for arsing around on the internet.
— Dave (@davechannel) July 30, 2021
Hear me out: Archery, but on trampolines.
— David Whitley (@mrdavidwhitley) July 30, 2021
Did you know if you swapped out your friday night takeaway and instead went down the gym for a workout you could lose the will to live.
— 𝐏𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 (@pearlylondon) July 30, 2021
People on twitter are angry, on facebook they’re deluded and on instagram they’re superficial. I’m going back to MySpace and Friendster.
— RainnWilson (@rainnwilson) July 30, 2021
How he’s not in jail already, I will never know. https://t.co/JYFWQ0KfyW
— Emma Kennedy💙 (@EmmaKennedy) July 30, 2021
It's time the IOC showed some ambition and awarded the 2036 Olympics to the Moon. The high jump would be insane for a start.
— Olaf Falafel (@OFalafel) July 30, 2021
An early glimpse of our new Queen Elizabeth II, Imelda Staunton. pic.twitter.com/ZeMSA1hDnv
— The Crown (@TheCrownNetflix) July 30, 2021
I really envy people who, when giving someone their surname, don’t have to say it and then also automatically spell it out too.
— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) July 30, 2021
is there a more ungainly spelling than 'eighth', utter chaos from letter to letter
— Lisa Owens (@lamowens) July 30, 2021
I’m from a working class family in East London, Poplar, Tower Hamlets & I am PROUD 🙌🏾
— Alex Scott MBE (@AlexScott) July 30, 2021
Proud of the young girl who overcame obstacles, and proud of my accent!
It’s me, it’s my journey, my grit.
(1/3) 👇🏾 https://t.co/EObv88MVS0
People currently saying “it’s all very well and good these sports people taking a break for their mental but I had to work when I didn’t want to and I had a breakdown!” are SO CLOSE to getting it.
— Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) July 30, 2021
Costa: you can’t come in if you’re not vaccinated
— GlennyRodge (@GlennyRodge) July 30, 2021
Anti-vaxxers: right, we’re boycotting you
Costa: this was easier than we thought it would be
Remember…@J_Ennis devastatingly had to pull out of the Beijing 2008 #Olympics when she broke her right ankle.
— Samantha Quek (@SamanthaQuek) July 31, 2021
She came back to win a spectacular gold medal at London 2012.
Keep your head up @dinaashersmith – we will see you at #Paris2024 🙌🏼
Find it amazing that with all the advances in engineering and high tech sports clothing, runners' names are still stuck on their bellies with safety pins.
— Aaron (@AaronBoardley) July 31, 2021
Greater love hath no man than this: that he goes to see Space Jam 2 TWICE for his kids.
— Martin Saunders 🤦🏻♂️ (@martinsaunders) July 31, 2021
When Stephen Fry steps in, you know all of our work is done. https://t.co/v8BrdfDosA
— Shaparak Khorsandi (@ShappiKhorsandi) July 31, 2021
A 🔟 isn't enough for this floor routine by @katelyn_ohashi. 🔥 pic.twitter.com/pqUzl7AlUA
— UCLA Gymnastics (@uclagymnastics) January 13, 2019
“I think he (PM) is a liar. We’ve all seen the Peter Stefanovic video, now on almost 29 MILLION VIEWS setting out very clearly where he’s lied at the dispatch box” @AndyMcDonaldMP
— Peter Stefanovic (@PeterStefanovi2) July 28, 2021
Government Minister Thérèse Coffey “I’m very proud he’s my Prime Minister” pic.twitter.com/HHHGcWlweB
It’s been a pleasure to sit next to @samanthaquek covering these games on #OlympicBreakfast
— Dan Walker (@mrdanwalker) July 28, 2021
This morning Sam spoke really powerfully about @simone_biles’s decision to withdraw from the gymnastics…#Olympics #Tokyo2020 #SimoneBiles #OlympicGames pic.twitter.com/rOqnWzFKGr
ineke.co.uk 
Anything to add...?