
UNFORTUNATE SIGNAGE in Bury St Edmunds? pic.twitter.com/9Ud1Z3gPmS
— Dungerman-Rob Dunger (@DungerRob) November 2, 2021
Longest 10 minutes ever: Waiting for your food to cook in a microwave.
— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) November 6, 2021
Shortest 10 minutes ever: Between hitting the snooze button and the alarm going off again.
This man helps a sloth to cross the road and the sloth is so grateful.. š pic.twitter.com/pmDXDUYgGd
— Buitengebieden (@buitengebieden_) November 6, 2021
Soap > Shower Gel
— Kate Bottley (@revkatebottley) November 9, 2021
Follow me for more rock and roll tweets about my celebrity lifestyle #blessed
Boris Johnson says he only wears masks in indoor settings with people he doesnāt know. Apart from hospitals obviously. No need for a mask there. pic.twitter.com/60lBRNABOp
— Stig Abell (@StigAbell) November 8, 2021
Could it be that Boris Johnson strolled through a hospital unmasked so we would talk about what a selfish, uncaring moral void he is instead of talking about how corrupt he is?
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) November 8, 2021
Could that really be how far weāve fallen? pic.twitter.com/wZFmEZim1v
Great question last night in the quiz @FarrarsArms
— Justin Moorhouse (@justinmoorhouse) November 9, 2021
What was the character Norville Rogers better known as in the long running childrenās television programme?
And, lose a letter from Norville, and check out who Orville Burrell is.
— Richard Osman (@richardosman) November 9, 2021
Ā£82,000 a year is a lot of money. Boggles my mind that MPs see that as "ugh guess I'd better get a second job to top up this pittance" money rather than "excuse me while my eyes turn to dollar signs like I'm in a fucking cartoon" money.
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) November 9, 2021
We know we should only be massively inspired and impressed by Chigs only learning how to bake last year. But we're also incredibly jealous that he's better at it than we are at anything else in our life. #GBBO
— innocent drinks (@innocent) November 9, 2021
EVERYBODY STAY CALM THEREāS A CRISP SHORTAGE.
— Greg James (@gregjames) November 9, 2021
SELL SELL SELL pic.twitter.com/aGUXxu6Ge3
After hearing the keypad karaoke this morning on @BBCR1 breakfast with @gregjames I decided to have a go at the unpopular opinion theme tune⦠conclusion – we should all stick to Mary had a little lamb pic.twitter.com/4b2hmBDE5I
— fruit flies like a banana š (@DaniedmundsDani) November 8, 2021
On Today prog this morning: Gordon Brown earns over £1m a year from speeches and writing but gives it all to charity. Some politicians really do have great integrity.
— Sonia Sodha (@soniasodha) November 10, 2021
Bolognese are coming
— Glenn Moore (@TheNewsAtGlenn) November 10, 2021
Bolognese are coming pic.twitter.com/iK9HoRYkp0
Thick milk chocolate and moist coconut that only a sprout could love… š¢ #LonelyBounty pic.twitter.com/X0XjYu1EqG
— Celebrations (@UKCelebrations) November 10, 2021
"did you hear what the guy in the Fred Flintstone costume said at that fancy dress party in the UAE?!"
— Aaron (@AaronBoardley) November 10, 2021
"the Abu Dhabi do?"
"i mean besides the obvious"
please note that when we say we have 'the biggest Nutcracker in London' we mean THE BALLET https://t.co/c1DiAqMtds
— Royal Albert Hall (@RoyalAlbertHall) November 10, 2021
Discovered today that WD40 is so called because it was the inventorās fortieth go at making a lubricant that worked through water displacement. pic.twitter.com/qpzclLh3Or
— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) November 10, 2021
As Paul Rudd is trending (for being voted People magazineās 2021 sexiest man alive) https://t.co/DnJdGhK8JI
— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) November 10, 2021
It might seem like a small thingā¦but it REALLY delights me to have my name back. At 16 I thought I was āreinventingā myself by getting rid of itā¦took me decades to realise I was actually hiding. Still Shap/Shappi/Dickhead sociallyā¦but this felt lush today. pic.twitter.com/WykYfq8sRs
— Shaparak Khorsandi (@ShappiKhorsandi) November 9, 2021
If an actual human showed the same obsessive interest in who wasn't wearing a bra as the Daily Mail does, they would be given a restraining order.
— Jojo Moyes (@jojomoyes) November 10, 2021
Know what I heard a LOT about as a kid? Cooking apples. RIP to them, not a cool fruit this century.
— Bella Mackie (@bellamackie) November 10, 2021
Let Cummings get away with it
— David Schneider (@davidschneider) November 10, 2021
Let Patel get away with it
Let Jenrick get away with it
Let Hancock & Gove get away with it
Tried to let Paterson get away with it
Let himself get away with it over and over again
CONCLUSION
āRule-breakers must be punishedā https://t.co/8FIMLrj48F
This is Louie. Heās been catching flights while youāve been catching feelings. 12/10 embarrassing for you pic.twitter.com/tap8D0ASX5
— WeRateDogsĀ® (@dog_rates) November 10, 2021
Caramelogram pic.twitter.com/KhHPi9Uym0
— Moose Allain ź¬ (@MooseAllain) November 10, 2021
An important point: The Prime Minister did more to save Owen Paterson than heās done to save Nazanin #FreeNazanin https://t.co/8YinbAf2Zj
— Stewart McDonald MP (@StewartMcDonald) November 9, 2021
Not all 2nd jobs are created equalā¦
— Marina Purkiss (@MarinaPurkiss) November 10, 2021
Take Rosena Allin-Khan
She is Labour MP for Tooting
ā¦and Shadow Cabinet Minister for Mental Health
ā¦and an A&E Doctor
Do you think that 2nd job helps or hinders her ability to be a good public servant?
Thatās the difference@DrRosena
Endlessly fascinating to me that from about 1997, life in this country got obviously, visibly, measurably better, and then around 2010 it just stopped. No idea what happened, seems weird
— Ahir Shah (@AhirShah) November 11, 2021
We've been speaking to people across the football community to launch #NoHomeKit. The idea is simple but powerful: this Boxing Day, clubs and fans ditch their home colours for their away or third kit, showing support for people who don't have a safe home.https://t.co/5Wse1LkFm9
— Shelter (@Shelter) November 9, 2021
As just mentioned on Zoe Ball on Radio 2, my recovering, post-op leg has gone weirdly dark and hairy, leading to me accusing my surgeon of transplanting my leg while I was knocked out. pic.twitter.com/xXtzcuhjJE
— Dara Ć Briain (@daraobriain) November 12, 2021
š pic.twitter.com/tgpmh1GymO
— Aldi Stores UK (@AldiUK) November 11, 2021
Tom Hanks as typewriters.
— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) November 12, 2021
A thread. pic.twitter.com/aF5NmkqiSu
World population by 1° longitude bands š#30daymapchallenge #day12 #population #qgis pic.twitter.com/moyw6LD8SX
— Helen McKenzie (@helenmakesmaps) November 12, 2021
"You were in talks to take a job yourself."
— Alex Nunns (@alexnunns) November 8, 2021
"No I wasn't. I was in discussion." pic.twitter.com/f7We5acRes
Major disruption between Bishops Stortford and Stansted after reports of a big cat on the line. pic.twitter.com/4dtNMHETOH
— Dick King-Smith HQ (@DickKingSmith) November 13, 2021
What is it that Aljaz is always shouting at the other dancers as he leaves the floor? Is it his drinks order for afterwards?
— Victoria Coren Mitchell (@VictoriaCoren) November 13, 2021
I cannot put into words how much of a special moment this was š The Drumathon has been overwhelming, but Iāll never forget these 2 minutes. What a team of drummers, thanks so much @MarkSkunkAnansi for orchestrating this performance pic.twitter.com/tvpKfCoJg8
— Owain Wyn Evans (@OwainWynEvans) November 13, 2021
Anything to add...?